Fail Forward to Success

Thomas Edison, who was considered as a kid to be stupid, once said, "I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”  Edison knew that there is no success without failure.  Failure is simply learning what will and won’t work.  Imagine if Edison quit after the 1st attempt, the 3rd attempt, the 999th attempt?  Albert Einstein couldn’t speak until he was 4 years old and was also considered to be of below average intelligence.  Henry Ford failed and went broke five different times before he became successful.  Walt Disney was fired once for his alleged lack of imagination.  Imagine the world if these people allowed failure to define them, not refine them?

Thru failure comes learning, thru learning comes improvement, thru improvement comes excellence, thru excellence comes legacy

Fear of Failure

Think of a time when you didn’t try something because you were afraid to fail. It happens to all of us. Prior to becoming a triathlete, I was asked to join a team of triathletes and train with them for a full distance Ironman. I didn’t want to. I was afraid that if I joined, I would fail.  If I failed, it would mean that I’m not good enough, I’m a failure, and that I don’t have what it takes. Haven’t we all felt that way? Maybe your fear of failure is tied to a potential new job, a potential new relationship, a potential new class or skill, a potential new activity, a potential new social circle.  Realize your fear, and then give it a shot anyway.  Nobody is perfect - we’ve all failed!  If you fail, at least you’ll be in the company of 100% of the rest of the human population.

Refine, Not Define

My favorite analogy is that failure is more like a bruise than a tattoo.  Failure isn’t permanent.  Failure doesn’t define you. If used properly, failure will refine you.  That’s the concept of failing forward - learning the lessons from the experience, applying those learnings, and trying again.  Yet too many people are afraid that failure will forever define them, so they take the easy way out. Thru failure comes learning, thru learning comes improvement, thru improvement comes excellence, thru excellence comes legacy. Thomas Edison’s story best exemplifies this concept.  He failed 1,000 times, but instead of using that failure to define himself as a failure, he used it to refine himself as one of the greatest innovators of all time. Failure doesn’t define you, it refines you.

A Winning Perspective

“Fail fast, learn fast, win fast, and win big” ~ Scott Howe.  Failure is awesome! It’s your way of telling the world I haven’t yet figured this out. It’s your way of telling the world I am getting closer to the solution because I found another approach that won’t work. It’s a stepping-stone on the way to victory. Failure is a tool. It’s an opportunity to learn. It’s an opportunity to reassess your approach. It’s an opportunity to demonstrate patience, resilience, character, and fortitude. It’s an opportunity to set aside your ego, humble yourself, and accept that neither you nor I are perfect. We’re human. We’re broken. We make mistakes. We’re imperfect... and that’s okay. While we were in fact wonderfully made and designed for accomplishment, we were also made to fail. The failure, however, was never meant to define us— it was meant to be a stepping stone on the way to success.

Making Failure Actionable

Start by doing an honest introspection of how you currently handle failure.  Do you get angry, blame others, get defensive, or make excuses?  That’s okay if you said yes - most people do.  Starting this second, you have the power to change that response going forward. Make a commitment to yourself to demonstrate resilience when, not if, you fail. Accept failure as a part of life. Allow yourself and others to fail. Consider failure to be a learning opportunity.  Make it a point to ask yourself a few key questions: what went wrong, why did it go wrong, what could you have done differently, how can you apply these learnings in the future?  By using these techniques in both your personal and professional life, you can reduce your fear of failure and turn failure events into opportunities to become better than ever.

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at  https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com

#enjoythejourney #motivation #inspiration #transformation #results #success #failforward

Tune for Performance

To create impeccably high-quality sound, audio engineers have a series of controls at their fingertips, which are carefully set to create the desired output.  The human body is no different. Unfortunately, we often define our own success by believing every control has to be set to maximum at all times, and when we don’t have enough time and energy, we feel overwhelmed and unsuccessful.  To create impeccably high-quality results, each of us has a series of controls at our fingertips, which we need to carefully adjust to create the desired results. “You can do anything, but not everything.” ~David Allen

Your Performance Dashboard

Picture a dashboard, like the one above, in which there is a series of controls. Think of each control as belonging to a particular dimension of your life.  Common dimensions include things like religion, marriage or relationship, kids, job, education, hobbies, exercise, community activities, relaxation, or anything else that consumes time and energy.  On your performance dashboard,  each dimension of your life has a corresponding control, and it can be adjusted on a scale ranging from 1 to 10.  A score of 1 represents a non-priority, on which you want to spend as little time and energy as possible.  A score of 10 represents a top priority, on which you want to spend every waking minute and every ounce of energy.

Define Your Controls

The first step is to figure out where you spend your time and energy.  Take a look at the common dimensions listed above, and consider all aspects of your life that either do consume time and energy or should consume time and energy.  Keep in mind that you should have controls for all dimensions of your life that consume time and energy, even if you don’t want them to!  For example, I have a control for watching TV, and even though I don’t want to spend much time watching TV, having a control set to 1 helps remind me that if I don’t manage that time, it will subconsciously work it’s way into my life. I also created a control for relaxation, which forces me to make time to relax. What controls do you need in your life? Grab a piece of paper and write them down.

Tune for Performance

Now it gets real. For each dimension, set the control to something in the range of 1-10.  The tricky part here is not setting everything to 10.  Sure, we all want to have wildly successful careers, awesome relationships, and abundant quality time with loved ones.  However, when time and energy are limited, where will you put the extra effort?  For example, if you’re single, no kids, and climbing the corporate ladder, work may be a 9 or 10. However, if you get married, have a baby, and are no longer seeking career advancement, maybe that control is set to a 5 or 6.  It doesn’t mean you’re trying any less - it just means you’re not putting in the extra time and effort, which may now be going to your newborn. Once you’ve scored the major dimensions of your life, stack rank the scores to make sure they align with your priorities in life.  

Monitor

Now that you’ve tuned your human machine for superior performance, do a quick calibration.  Take a look at how you’re actually spending your time and exerting your energy.  Does it align with how you set the controls?  If not, make some course corrections, and find ways to get yourself back in alignment. This may require you to adjust your calendar - maybe you need to wake-up earlier to make time for exercise, or maybe you need to schedule 30 minutes in the evening to meditate.  It may also require you to adjust your to-do list.  Maybe you’re doing things you shouldn’t, in which case you can delete them, or maybe you’re not doing things you should. Once aligned, continue monitoring to stay aligned!

Recalibrate

The only constant in life is change. Recalibration should be done periodically to ensure the controls continue to reflect your priorities in life.  Furthermore, recalibration should be done whenever you undergo a major life event.  Items like birth of a child, death of a loved one, a new relationship, a new job or promotion, major illness, a new hobby or activity, etc. are events that cause us to recalibrate. Consider the example of a new exercise enthusiast, who quickly becomes so addicted to working out that it interferes with relationships, kid time, and even work.  In this case, recalibrating helps determine where the extra time for exercise is coming from. Make it a point to periodically recalibrate for success.

Fail Forward

You will make mistakes.  You’ll accidentally omit time-consuming dimensions of your life, you’ll misalign a few controls here and there, and you won’t always get it right.  That’s normal!  Learn from your mistakes, apply your learnings, and keep trying.  Before  long, you’ll find yourself better managing your time, becoming more productive, feeling less overwhelmed, and you’ll be happier because you’ll be spending your time the way you want to do it.

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at  https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com
#enjoythejourney #motivation #inspiration #transformation #results #success

Overcome All Odds

Everyone loves an underdog. Everyone loves the story of a winner who had to overcome seemingly impossible odds.  The 1980 USA Men’s Hockey Team earned Olympic gold after defeating a Soviet team that had been unbeatable for years.  Buster Douglas was a 42-1 underdog when he knocked out the undefeated, undisputed heavyweight champion of the world, Mike Tyson.  And, of course, many of us were glued to the big screen as we watched the underdog Rocky Balboa come back to defeat Apollo Creed.  We all love winning, but we all love winning more when the odds are stacked against us. There are three keys when it comes to overcoming all odds: belief, courage, and resilience.

Belief

When I first started running marathons, I was an underdog. I wasn’t a runner. In fact, I hated running, and the prospect of running 26.2 miles terrified me… until my mentor said, “I believe in you.”  Those words transformed the impossible to the possible.  They drove me to positive action: eating right, researching the sport, working with him to create a plan, and diligently following the plan. They programmed me to believe that success was a foregone conclusion, and I started acting that way. Believing in yourself programs your mind and body for unlimited success.  It sends a powerful, positive message to your subconscious mind that drives action. It enables you to overcome seemingly impossible odds. The words “I believe in you” can change a destiny. 

Courage

You can’t win it if you’re not in it. There’s a Bible story about an epic battle between David and Goliath several thousand years ago. David wasn’t even invited to the battle. However, he had the courage to show up, and when nobody stepped up to take on the mighty Goliath, David rose to the occasion. David was the underdog, the kid, the shepherd, the guy with no armor, and his only weapon was a slingshot. Goliath was a killing machine - a one-man wrecking crew with armor, the best weaponry, and a history of destroying everything in his path. Everyone knew who was going to win this battle. However, when the battle started, David grabbed a rock, pulled back his slingshot, and fired, lodging the rock deep in the skull of the giant warrior, sending him to an early grave. 

Resilience

Resilience is a learned skill, demonstrated by the most successful people in life, in which one is able to accurately assess their current situation and face the cold, hard facts.  Based on those facts, they create a plan of action, and they create a sense of purpose.  Ultimately, they relentlessly attack barriers - going over, under, around, or through anything that stands in the way.  In a nutshell, resilience is the ability to bounce back from adversity and forge a path to success.  It’s a process by which one never gives up, and when life hands them lemons, as it often does, they figure out how to make lemonade.  Dean Becker says, “More than education, more than experience, more than training, a person’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails. That’s true in the cancer ward, it’s true in the Olympics, and it’s true in the boardroom.”

My Challenge to You

Consider the Goliaths in your life. Maybe your Goliath is an addiction. Maybe it’s pornography, alcohol, or tobacco.  Maybe it’s a difficult boss, a failing relationship, or a challenging teenager. Whatever it may be, think of this as an epic battle in which you’re the underdog.

• Believe: start programming your mind and body for success.  Start believing in yourself.  Let that belief drive transformative positive action. You were born of the seeds of greatness; you were carefully architected with perfection and designed for accomplishment. You have what it takes!

• Be Courageous: nobody every won by sitting on the sidelines. The word fear has prevented more people from reaching their potential than any other word in the English language - fear of success, fear of failure.  Think of fear as an acronym - false expectations appearing real.  As you evaluate the Goliaths in your life, ask yourself if fear is limiting you.  Then, without missing a beat, just go for it - jump in and win.

• Be Resilient: objectively assess your current situation by looking at the cold, hard facts.  Create a plan of action based on those facts, and create an overarching sense of purpose that will motivate and guide you along the way.  Then seek out any barriers to success, and utterly destroy them. Go over them, go around them, or go through them.  Whatever it takes. Expect to be handed lemons along the way, and figure out how to turn them into lemonade.

In the words of the great Dr. Fred Hatfield, “If you believe these things, then for you winning is neither everything nor the only thing.  It's a foregone conclusion! But, if along the way, you should somehow stumble, profit from the experience!  And vow, by the power of Almighty God, it'll NEVER happen again!"

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com

The Season for Joy

Living amongst the poorest of poor, I realized that true happiness and joy come from within.  I’ve been on multiple mission trips to Haiti, the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere. One might think that in a country overrun with poverty, corruption, disease, and a lack of food and water, stress would be a problem. I expected to see people worried about things like food, water, sanitation, disease, and education.  While the people of Haiti live in some of the worst poverty, in which the pursuit of food and clean water is often a daily challenge, they are also the most joyful people I’ve ever met. Joy isn't a response to circumstances, it's a choice.

Love What You Do

Life’s not just about a destination, but it’s also about the journey to that destination. Stop saying, “Thank God it’s Friday.” Stop saying, “I can’t wait until…” And start saying, “Thank God it’s today.” The American workforce has expressions like “hump day” to illustrate the fact that we tolerate work for five days so we can live on the weekends.  It’s time to rethink our attitudes. It’s time to approach work with a spirit of thankfulness and joy.  A job isn’t a curse, it’s a gift and a blessing.  It’s an opportunity to grow, learn, develop, be creative, make a difference in the lives of others, and make some money in the process.  If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life.

Manage Stress

“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it” ~ Lou Holtz. When bad things happen, how do you respond? Successful people anticipate and act proactively to avoid or minimize stressful situations. When in stressful situations, successful people remain calm and respond positively. They adapt to the situation and figure out what needs to be done. They introduce joy to any situation. On the other hand, unsuccessful people react with pessimism and negativity.  Instead of remaining calm, they overreact, they create drama, they addict, and they allow stress to take control. If stress controls you, it will ultimately bring you down—in addition to the inevitable health issues, it will destroy your joy. “Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” ~Matthew 6:27.  

Choose Joy

Galatians 5:22 says, “The fruits of the spirit are peace, love, joy…” Notice the two key words: fruit, joy. This isn’t a suggestion, it’s a divine command for you to produce fruit by being peaceful, loving, and joyful.  Think about it - you can produce fruit for others by being joyful!  Joy is contagious. You can choose to infect others with negativity and pessimism, or you can choose to positively impact others with passion and joy.  Joy creates a slice of Heaven for those around you.  “The best thing you can do, the best fruit you can produce, to change the world is to create a little slice of Heaven for someone every day.” ~Tom Hagan.  

The Challenge

Joy isn’t based on circumstance, it’s based on attitude. Joy is an everyday decision we need to make - at home, at work, and in our communities. We can choose to be joyful in spite of our circumstances, or we can choose to allow others and/or our circumstance to dictate our happiness.  Don’t be a victim. Don’t allow others to control your outcome. Own it. Take control.  Choose to be joyful, choose to create a slice of heaven for someone every day, and choose to make a difference.

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at  https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com

Organize for Excellence

“If you want something done, give it to a busy person.” Have you ever wondered why that expression is true? It’s because busy people are masters of time management. Busy people don’t think of each day as 24 hours - they think of each day as 86,400 prioritized and planned seconds. While our calendars are divided into 30 minute increments, our lives are not. We have 86,400 opportunities each and every day, and we get to choose how to use every single one of them.

Manage Your Time

Most of us manage time in a reactive, rather than proactive, mode.  That is, we react when emails arrive, we react to the pile of papers on our desk, we react to phone notifications, and once those are done, we look at our to-do list. We need to manage our time based on a prioritized to-do list. Focus first on the most important item on your to-do list, then focus on the next priority. With each task, ask yourself, “What’s the best use of my time right now” and then focus on that task until it's done.  

Manage Your Calendar

The to-do list is best suited for items that aren’t constrained to a given start and end time.  Items that have a specified start and end time belong on your calendar.  Notice that it’s your calendar - not your calendars.  While you may use different calendaring tools for work and home, stay organized by always having a single, master view of your calendar that drives your daily actions.  When putting items on your calendar, ask the question, “Is this the best use of my time?” If you want to have a date night on Friday, put it on the calendar.  If you want to work out every morning from 6-7am, put it on your calendar. The calendar should reflect your priorities and represents your plan of how you choose to spend your time each day.

Manage Your Distractions

Everything screams for your time. Phone calls, texts, emails, and notifications are all competing for your time and focus.  Unlike  powerful computers, our brain is only capable of focusing on one task at a time. In fact, attempting to multitask only reduces productivity as your brain has to re-orient itself every time your focus shifts to a new task.  When emails arrive or notifications pop up on your phone, resist the urge to give them your attention until you’re done with the current task.  When you do handle mail, whether snail or email, handle it once and only once. Do one of four things with mail: act on it, file it for reference, delete it, or create a task on your to-do list to act on it later.

Manage Your Downtime

Every day, we waste countless, valuable seconds. If you want to better manage your time, especially when you find a few unexpected minutes of downtime, have some “filler” tasks on your to-do list.  Put some tasks on your list specifically for those moments, and label them as filler tasks. For example, create tasks called “filler: read professional development articles” or “filler: read the Bible” or “filler: meditate." That way, when you’re in the doctor’s waiting room or a meeting is starting late, go to your to-do list, find a filler task, and act upon it immediately. While those small blocks of time seem insignificant, they add up quickly and can become your best productivity tool.  

Putting it Together

Life’s short, and you can go through the motions of life and allow time to control you, or you can take action and take control. Too many people use the excuse, “I’m too busy.”  While they’re busy using the excuse, people who are much busier are finding ways to get things done.  There’s never a good time to do something. You need to make the time to make it happen. Rather than letting those 86,400 seconds slip away every day, put them to work for you.

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at  https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com

Define Yourself

Who are you? No, I’m not going to start reciting 1970s rock songs. But who are you and what do you stand for? What are you passionate about? What causes would you die for? What defines you as a person - a worker, a parent, a child, a spouse, a friend, a neighbor? We have one shot. That’s what we get. One shot to make a difference. One shot to leave a legacy of greatness. One shot to dream your dreams and make them come true. So I ask again, who are you?

Tell Me About Yourself

We are asked this question a lot - in interviews, in social situations, in business settings.  How often do we answer by citing our job title?  "I’m an accountant.” “I’m an engineer.”  “I own my own business.” Given the setting, that may be an important piece of the answer, but it’s not the whole answer.  Think about the roles you play in life… a parent, a spouse, a child, a friend, an employer, an employee, a child of God, a boater, a recreational athlete, a volunteer, an avid reader. You are defined by the sum of what you do in life, not how you earn a living.  Life’s not about finding yourself, it’s about defining yourself!

You Are Your Character

“Character is doing the right thing when nobody is looking” ~ J.C. Watts. Character isn’t a one-and-done. Character isn’t defined when you’re on easy street.  Character is defined one decision at a time; it’s carefully molded over a lifetime as one rides the good times but also perseveres through adversity. Life’s short, and there are a million excuses waiting for you. You can always take the easy way out, and you can always rationalize why you didn’t succeed.  But that’s not what we're called to do. We were put on this planet to fulfill destinies far greater than ourselves. We were designed to live a life of character. Character is a statement to the world that answers the question, “Who are you?”  

Legacy = Purpose + Passions + Priorities

In last week's blog, I talked about the 3 Ps in life:

• Purpose - the reason you believe you were put on earth; the legacy you plan to leave for generations to come
• Passion - how you enjoy spending your time, talents, and treasure
• Priorities - your North Star in life that guide your decisions, your actions, where you will and won't spend your time, and where you will and won't sacrifice

When you put together the sum of all three, you're defining your legacy.  You’re writing the story of you, which will be passed on for generations to come. You’re defining the mark you are leaving on the world. Maybe your past hasn’t been so great, but today is a new day and a new you. Your story begins today - write it! 

Challenge

I encourage you to carve out 15 minutes this week and do the following: 

1. Think about the many roles you play in life.  Write them down. Consider the message that each role sends to others about you.  Are you a child of God? What’s your career? What roles do you play in a family - parent, child, spouse, caregiver? What are your hobbies and volunteer activities? How else do you spend your time? Write them down, and the next time someone says, “Tell me about yourself,” tell them about the whole you.
2. Think about your character. How would others describe you during times of crisis?  If you're not sure, ask those around you. Do you display honesty and integrity even when it may work against you? Do you persevere instead of looking for an easy way out?  Do you own problems and take accountability for solutions instead of pointing a finger? Do you do the right thing even when nobody’s looking? In what areas can you improve your character?
3. Define your legacy. Write it down.  Write down the words you’d like to have people say at your funeral. Write down the words you’d like to have people use to describe you generations from now… Godly, family-oriented, kind, loving, caring, generous, compassionate, results-oriented, driven, motivated, inspirational, fearless.  It’s up to you.

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at  https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com

Living the Dream

"I want to play professional baseball." "I want to be a rock star." "I want to be a movie star." "I want to be an astronaut." As kids, we all had dreams, and we weren’t afraid to dream big because nobody had ever squelched our hopes and dreams. No kid ever dreamt of mediocrity. Yet as adults, we view life from a mediocre perspective.  We say things like “TGIF" and "hump-day" as if our lives only have joy and meaning on weekends. We set low standards such as “getting by” and “paying the bills” as  acceptable.  When we use words like “living the dream,” why are we more sarcastic than serious? What ever happened to those child-like dreams? 

Your Four-Minute Mile

For hundreds of years before 1954, running a mile in under four minutes was deemed physically impossible.  It didn’t just seem impossible, it was scientifically determined that humans were incapable of doing so. Roger Bannister refused to believe that this was impossible. He programmed his mind and body as if the four-minute mile was a foregone conclusion, and to solidify his place in history, he then trained as if it would happen.  While others were explaining to him the science of why it was impossible, he was busy making it happen.   On May 6, 1954, Roger Bannister ran the first four-minute mile in history with a time of 3:59.  Within a year, someone else ran a four-minute mile.  Now, it’s almost routine. We all have self-limiting beliefs. We all have limits imposed upon us by others. Maybe it’s time to break the paradigm and program your mind and body for success.  What’s your four-minute mile?

Think Like an Infant

If babies were negatively programmed like most adults, they would never learn to walk. Most of them would never even try to stand up, as they’d be afraid of failure. They’d be afraid to fail, afraid to get laughed at, afraid to not be conforming to the ways of the world. They simply wouldn’t try. For those that did try, they would fall once. They’d point a finger and blame their parents, their environment, the carpet, and anything else to justify their failure. Worse yet, they’d try, fall once, and use the “c” word. They’d doom their destiny by saying, “I can’t.” Fortunately, the human brain protects infants, but over time, people are conditioned to dream smaller and to fear failure. It's time to dream big, abolish fear, and relentlessly pursue those dreams. 

Go Big or Go Home

What would it take for you to live the dream?  First, define the dream. What are your three P’s in life: your purpose, your passion, and your priorities?  If you don’t know, it’s worth carving out some time to think about it.

• Purpose - the reason you believe you were put on earth; the legacy you plan to leave for generations to come
• Passion - how you enjoy spending your time, talents, and treasure
• Priorities - your North Star in life that guide your decisions, your actions, where you will and won't spend your time, and where you will and won't sacrifice

Using the three P’s, now set a far-reaching goal. Run a marathon, learn a new language, take an exotic vacation, grow into a new career, lose weight, find new ways to spend more quality family time, go on a mission trip… the sky’s the limit. Aim high and go for it!

Putting it Together

Life’s short. You were meant to thrive, not just survive. Don’t sell yourself short - destroy all false self-limiting beliefs, destroy all fear of failure, aim high, go big, and go for it!  If you do, I promise the journey of a lifetime.

Welcome to the new you.  Enjoy the journey... 

Check out Enjoy the Journey on Amazon.com at  https://goo.gl/G9BM8O

Learn more about Dave VanEpps or request a speaking engagement at www.davevanepps.com